Where it all began

This is how I started.

Me at 22

This is where it all started.   I must be 20 years old in a basement bedroom in a shared house the second year of college. Actually, it probably started way before that: He-Man was a big influence as a kid, I identified with soft-spoken Prince Adam (his alter ego); Built like a brick shit house, and the pink shirt he usually sported,
clearly stated he was confident in his masculinity.

In my teens, it was Jean Claude Van Damme movies that inspired me to actually try and change my physique. My Dad had a lot of tools, and I took his bar clamps, (steel bars that kept pieces of wood together while the glue set) and some bricks with holes in them and made a barbell. I had no idea what the hell I was doing, but I had seen Arnold curl a bar, so that’s what I did.

I was a shy quiet kind of kid. I wasn’t really sure where I fit in. I wasn’t in the cool-kid crowd for sure, but I wasn’t a geek or a rocker… I was just invisible! I thought if I build a body like Jean Claude I could get the respect I craved; just like that skinny kid in the back of the comic book that got buff after getting sand kicked at him by the bully. (for you millenials, comic books are cartoons you have to read like a magazine) I remember I begged the only built guy at the gym at college to make me a program. I treated it like the 10 commandments. It was the most important part of my week.
Well, that is, until pub night, then it was beer till Sunday! All that estrogenic hops, and extra carbs did little to improve my physique, not to mention the 2-4- 1 pizza that was my go-to for meals on weekends.

So then real life happens you get a job, a relationship and you start trying to figure yourself out. The workouts dropped off, and the beer continued. I remember one Christmas photo I saw changed all that. My moon face, those sad lost eyes… I was clearly not where I was supposed to be. (Of course it was months and months later before I saw the picture. We had film back then.. you used to keep a camera for special occasions and have to drop off the film to get it developed.. so sometimes it was years of memories captured in 36 pictures.

By that time I was mid 20’s, I was ready to actually work at being who I wanted to be. The lab tech job was not what I had hoped it would be, and I was working part- time for a photographer. Being around the beautiful people is a good motivator. My first gig I was on set with Claudia Schiffer. I remember being dragged thru a trade show carrying a 100lb bag of equipment trying to keep up with the entourage. We all pack on to an elevator. I’m last, and I’m jammed in… face pretty much in her boobs, trying not to drop the bag onto her hand-dyed Vercace seafoam suede boots.

In those years I met plenty of male models, and damn it! I want to look like that! (albeit way shorter) So I asked questions, got advice, did some reading and research, ate right (stopped drinking beer), and I literally worked my ass off. Finally after years of effort, I got the body that 20 year old me in the picture thought he so desperately wanted, and thought it would finally solve all my problems..

It didn’t…..

So shy quiet farmtown boy, now finally had all the attention he thought he sought and had no frick’n idea how to manage it.

I thought I just need some self-confidence, so I thought I’d try some physique modeling. I knew the one side of the camera by then, so it was a natural transition. I did workout magazine spreads, calendars, ADs for gyms and spas, and yes, even some fridge magnets. But I still wasn’t confident, and had the worst time trying to talk to people. People wanted to know me because I had something they liked, and I
wanted them to like the real me. I might have been introduced to them, but I had no idea who I was.

So mid-mid life crisis arises and I run off to California.. Big mistake; huge mistake! If you aren’t comfortable in your own skin in Canada, L.A. is not really going to go too well. I lasted 6 months, and returned home. Thankfully those that loved me took me back in. California gave me perspective…I finally had a goal… get your frick’n life together!

I knew who I didn’t want to be and I realized just what mattered to me. I wanted real relationships, I wanted to do something to help people, make their lives better. I got certified in personal training, and I went to a holistic nutrition school. I had the pieces of the puzzle coming together: People, food, exercise.

Fast forward many years ahead. I had real relationships, my knowledge of nutrition helped my Dad fight cancer for much longer than they thought, (working out kept me sane thru that process.) I finally did my first bodybuilding show at the age of 37, (and won my class).

I love what I do! Personal training has given me a very intimate glimpse into other people’s lives, and to see just how much others struggle. My story is no different. We are all trying to make our way in life the best we can. Yes I still have trouble making small talk sometimes, but helping others be their best, is more rewarding than just having muscles. (but that being said, I’m pretty happy to still have ‘em)

I was going to say, I wish I had known enough to work on the inside, not just the outside.

But this is my journey… if it had been different I wouldn’t be where I am today, and I am truly grateful to be living the life I am living now.

Ironically, as I was writing this and sipping my “Yogi tea”. (the tags always
have messages), it reads: Without realizing who you are, happiness cannot
come to you.) So I hope to inspire you a little bit to just be yourself, find your own truth, maybe you’re already there!

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.